Why is my boyfriend still on online dating sites

Why is my boyfriend still on online dating sites

 · What Does it Mean When Your Boyfriend is Still on a Dating Site? It’s pretty simple really. He is keeping his options open. When a man is committed to you he is committed to contributing to your happiness as well. You won’t likely find him still active on a dating site. I don’t care what he tells you or what excuse he blogger.coms: 6  · Anyone who has done online dating seriously will confirm that there always seems to be people lurking on the edges, folks who are up for a chat but not for a blogger.comted Reading Time: 5 mins When Your Boyfriend is Still on a Dating Site - What to do?

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I was wondering if you could help me with something that has been playing on my mind recently…. It recently transpired that my boyfriend of 15 months has been looking at girls on a dating website that he used to use before he met me.

At first, he replied that he has a couple of times, and then when I was unsure whether he was being honest, I asked again and he then said a couple of times a week. He reassured me that he was not going on there to look for girls, but just to look at their pictures. I told him that I found this a bit weird that he is going on a dating website to look at other girls, when supposedly he is in a relationship with me.

I told him how it why is my boyfriend still on online dating sites upset me and how disrespectful I found it, especially as it was a dating website. After this all came out about him looking at dating sites, he seemed to take this all back and reminded me that he is heterosexual. I have also wondered in the past whether we have different boundaries in terms of sex, as he has slept with more people than me about 20whereas I have only had 2 sexual partners him and my ex.

Is this typical male behaviour and I am just unable to see beyond my own female perspective? If it is, what things should I be asking myself or focus on to try and stop my mind from going over all this stuff in my head? Should I be feeling so insecure or do I just need to let it go?

I know this has made me feel insecure and I hate it, I just want to enjoy being in the relationship again! I would really appreciate any advice you have or to point me in the right direction with your books, as I find your site a great resource for relationship issues and whenever I type it into google it comes up with all sorts of unhelpful forums.

This is a really tough one because where do you draw the line between normal and dangerous — especially as technology has made the line much more blurry. In the past, we might actually look at contact adverts in the back of newspapers for a bit of fun imagining what it might be like to meet these people. However, in the old days we would have to find a photo, write a letter, post it to a PO Box and wait for a reply.

As you can imagine this can lead to all sorts of problems. The other big difference is that our homes are much more porous than before.

What do I mean by this? In the past, there was one phone and we knew who had called. This is why I find it very difficult to draw the line between between acceptable and unacceptable behaviour and whether your reaction is normal or over-the-top.

A little bit like a dog that barks when the postman delivers a letter two doors down. Emotive language and that is going to make you highly emotional and the whole situation becomes more charged.

The first is say nothing and hope for the best which is what most people favour. Here we turn why is my boyfriend still on online dating sites and our partners into two maiden aunts who are not allowed to find anybody else attractive or get any visual or emotional stimulation from anybody else.

The result is we start to switch ourselves off and that makes it much harder to become sexual, why is my boyfriend still on online dating sites. I suppose the best way to describe the difference between shutting yourself off and simmering is the 50 Shades of Grey phenomena. Lots of women have why is my boyfriend still on online dating sites reading this book and finding it such a great turn on and they have leapt on their partner.

I explain more about simmering in Make Love like a Prairie Vole. I think you would find this book helpful. The other way to deal with the more porous boundaries into our household is to make certain that you have a better why is my boyfriend still on online dating sites rather than take each other for granted. I explain more about this in How Can I Ever Trust You Again? So instead of taking your relationship for granted, you make certain that you can communicate properly and if your partner is unhappy about something he will talk to you about it.

However, by worrying you are putting a big barrier between you and your partner. If you learn from the experience and take the advice of your friend and try to get into the mind-set of men and my advice and learn more about relationships, I think you can turn this temporary glitch into something that will strengthen your relationship.

Marital therapist and author of I Love You But I'm Not in Love With You. Expert on resolving infidelity and falling back in love. I just wish to have experienced people opinions about my situation. That really influenced my life, because not that I find my decision wrong, but the way I handled it made me really innocent, right now I even feel stupid.

But when I met my fiancé I was disappointed at life and he showed me such affection that I had ever experienced. So we went out in a couple of dates, but after that I tried to finish things saying we were too different. He was so frustrated and really insisted that we should be together because we had something special.

He felt really bad, because he knew that I liked him and even so I was letting him go. After a couple of days I decided to face my family and say that I would be with him and I did it.

He was really happy, but I was too scared because it was a big step and I knew we were too different. He said he would do anything, so we kept going. The one thing I told him was that I was saving myself for marriage and he agreed. Then it all started. The problem is I was involved in the moment too. Sometimes I really tried to change the way he were just to my family to approve him more. I accept the way he were, but I wanted my family to love him.

We started having big fights almost every week about our differences, sometimes about my fears. I even tried to break up with him a lot of times, because he was getting angry at me. I felt really guilty about it. Sometimes I went to his house and we had sex, but the other day I would feel guilty and say we would never to that again before we are married. We had a lot of fights, because he said that he felt really lonely and he needed me. The fights never stopped, because I tried to get him to be more like me in terms of beliefs.

But he wanted to marry me to make things happen, he never stopped planning on marrying me. We got engaged on February Then on March 22 I found that he cheated on me with an ex.

I was devastating, because I read everything that talked online. I know he was having a hard time, because the grandparent who raised him was with terminal cancer, still I can only see the lies and cheating. First time he talked to her was on April He talked about sex they had on the why is my boyfriend still on online dating sites and asked her to have sex with him again, the only thing they talked was about sex! Then on September I broke up with him, the same day he talked to her about sex and asked her to come see him in his town.

He even paid her tickets. So she stayed with him for three days. He said the treated her badly she confirmed accidentally and that it meant nothing, he was just feeling really weak and lonely. But when he was with her, why is my boyfriend still on online dating sites, he went to my house to give me presents with our names on them!

So we kept going on our wedding plans and still we were fighting about lots of things, because the divorce papers from his first wedding were not with him, and he had to make contact with his ex wife and that was really stressful time for him.

He said I was selfish because his grandpa was dying and it was the only chance of him seeing him getting married. Until now he blames me for it. On December we had a fight because he went to the city of his grandparent and tried to talk about sex with me on the phone he probably was addict to it because of the other and even tried, but I felt so dirty that I told him to stop.

Then he said we would never work out, because I always made him feel like garbage. He decided to continue with me, but some days after that he called her to come to where he was she lived there tooshe went and he cheated again. Then he called me to go there to be with him and I went. We were fine for 10 days, his grandpa was really bad and feeling pain, he was really sad. When I came back home before new year, he cheated with her again.

Then he came back to our city and I think he stopped talking to the girl. At least it how I understand. When he was out of town working he got the news that his grandpa with die within some few days, the same day we had a fight over a stupid thing. He blames me forever for that. He went to see his grandpa and broke up with me. The next day I was there and he treated me really badly the other had appeared in the funeralI even suspected he was talking to a woman on his phone once.

Then we had a big fight, he humiliated me and was so angry. I just had to come back home and I did. It turns out that he went out with her a couple of times there. And even appeared drunk at her house saying he would never forget her. Meanwhile he was calling me saying he was sorry for the way the treated me and still wanted to get married, why is my boyfriend still on online dating sites. I knew something was up, because she started posting old pictures he took of her on their old dates.

I was really angry and confronted him, he denied everything. Once he came back we went out and I went to his house saying that I was decided to change my ways and make our relationship better. We had sex and promise to be together again and get married.

He deleted the picture and blocked her as I told him to. Only that she was so angry that she told me everything, why is my boyfriend still on online dating sites. She called me bad names and threatened me.

I was really scary, angry, sad, disappoint and terrified. She is known in her town as a reckless young woman who would have sex with anyone. Even a friend of mine confirmed that when she was dating my fiancé she cheated on him many times.

Why is my boyfriend still on online dating sites - What happens when you catch

Your boyfriend is on dating is because he is not interested with you. I'm telling you not what you want to hear but what is needed to be heard. You need to ask him why he is on dating sites. Remember communication is the number one thing in a relationship  · It's never good to investigate what other people are doing online." Obsessing over whether someone is online, or whether they've left you on read, can also cause divides between people. "This is why people get annoyed with each other, you see someone has been active ten minutes ago and hasn't replied to you," Stott blogger.comted Reading Time: 4 mins  · What Does it Mean When Your Boyfriend is Still on a Dating Site? It’s pretty simple really. He is keeping his options open. When a man is committed to you he is committed to contributing to your happiness as well. You won’t likely find him still active on a dating site. I don’t care what he tells you or what excuse he blogger.coms: 6